Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
