billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
