oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Randomize
