Screwed.edu
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Randomize
