She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
