My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Randomize
