You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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