He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
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