I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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