You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
this will be a night to untag.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
We are all done wearing pants today
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
