What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
