This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I think my vagina is haunted
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize