...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
