We're facebook friends in real life
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
The ass gains better be worth it
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
