yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize
