so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Randomize
