Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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