Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
