He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
