..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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