Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize