my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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