i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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