yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
