Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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