It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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