Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
