Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize