Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
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