They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
bring money and cleavage
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
