How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
