So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Can you bring me the toilet please
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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