I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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