I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
