yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
