well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
