Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
