Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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