Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Randomize
