just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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