i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
