all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
