I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
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