What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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