We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
