the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
