She's JV to your varsity
This girl is more easily done than said...
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
