So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
