A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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