well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
